Hoe into a Housewife?

Yesterday I posted about Karrine Steffans' twitter rant re: her husband, marriage, and overall feeling of frustration with his lack of, well... everything. It sparked an interesting conversation with one of my male friends who was shocked I could find anything entertainment, enjoyable, or redeeming in Steffans.

From his standpoint,  "You don't put your husband out there like that. Period. You don't allow the whole industry to run through you and be filmed and then try to get married to someone you know is not you. It's some hoe shit and all I'm seeing is 'I'm used to being a hoe and you no longer do it for me'." 


While I did agree that it was quite sloppy to air one's dirty laundry in such a public way, I have to say that everything she said was quite relatable for most women. Women have the innate ability to bite our tongues while giving someone a verbal lashing like none other.

On another note, I think her twitter rant was actually related to her latest book she's about to release, and NOT spazzing out on her husband.

@KarrineandCo - - every woman's hero....

Everyone knows her better as Super Head, but let's be real - - Karrine Steffans has far surpassed her original come up into the game. She's a NY Times best selling author and someone whose blatant honesty and candor I've always enjoyed. Love her or hate her, she's interesting and I'm all about interesting people.

Today (read: moments ago) I stumbled across the NecoleBitchie post showing Karrine's late night twitter rant against her husband. All I can say is wow!!! Every woman has felt the way she's felt as one time or another... and if you haven't? Consider it in your future. Seriously. I don't necessarily agree with airing dirty laundry (I'm more the type to throw it in the wash at my own place lol...), but I can appreciate the trainwreck that is her marriage and the self-esteem her husband is sure to be scraping off the floor. Does this woman know how to reduce a man to nothingness or what! Not sure if it's a quality skill to have, but the shit is hilarious!!

Karrine's Twitter Rant:

Sometimes, in relationships, the pleasure is all theirs. Alone, I am a superhero. With you, I am a mere mortal. You deplete me. I’m tired of being your upgrade. We are not equally yoked. You really deserve someone more basic. I’m tired of pretending your mediocracy is okay with me. I’m tired of pretending I don’t miss G650′s. I’m tied of pretending you’re not a burden.I’m tired of pretending I don’t deserve a f-cking BOSS! I’m tired of you driving my car. Stop telling me you love me as if you’re doing me some sort of favor. I don’t need you to love me. I love me. I’m tired of pretending like you shouldn’t be intimidated by the other men in my life. Cuz you should. I’m tired of pretending as if I support your bullshit dreams. I’m tired of pretending your d-ck isn’t the smallest d-ck I’ve ever seen in my life. Cuz it is. I’m tired of pretending your favorite rapper didn’t just beat it up on Friday. I’m tired of paying for everything.

I’m tired of you taking all this sh-t for granted as if you ever deserved any of it. Give me my Mac back. For real tho. I’m tired of washing your wack ass clothes. I hate your whole face. I’m tired of acting like the sex is good.I hate when you roll all the way over onto my side of the bed to hold me. I’m over here for a reason. Did I mention I’m tired of paying for everything? Okay.I’m tired of giving you the game.I’m tired of pretending you’re anything more than a bum. I should’ve just hired you as a cook and kept it moving. I’m tired of congratulating you for accomplishing minuscule sh-t. I’m tired of you begging.

I’m tired of moaning when I can’t feel anything!I’m tired of having to think about someone else to get off. I’m tired of having to lock my phone when you’re around.I’m tired of taking showers with you. Can I get a moment! Damn! Yes. He’s better than you. Next question. All night. ‘Til 6 in the morning. Next question.Yes. And I didn’t have to pay for none of it. Next question. Presidential suite. Next question. About 10 inches. Next question.69. Next question. Like a boss. Next question. Balls deep. Next question. I’m tired of having to pretend you’re not the 3rd worst decision I’ve ever made.You should really be with that one chick who bagged our groceries this weekend. That’s more your speed.

So, why do I call her every woman's hero? Well, I can personally attest to having felt some of the same feelings and wishing I had the balls to put someone on blast. I'm not that messy... but don't we all wish we had a messy friend whose ratchet ways and loose lips we could vicariously live through? Come to think of it, I'm sure I fill that spot for a few of my friends lol... but when you're that friend who do you look to? Look no further than Karrine!

The last time I put a relationship on blast was back in 2009 when my then boyfriend had failed to ever get the electricity at our condo put into his name. Very mild in comparison, but I received an earful for those posts.

So, blogging family - - when is the last time you put someone on relationship front street?

Single + Kids = Damaged Goods?

Growing up I always had 3 deal breakers for a man and potential relationship: Smokers, Kids, and Rappers. Why, you may ask? First I loathe cigarette smoke and could never love someone that's smoking squares all day. Hell no. Kids? I always had a dream of meeting someone, falling in love, and having kids together for the first time. I convinced myself that if I was with a man who previously had kids from another relationship somehow our children would be "less special" since it wasn't the first time, not to mention the potential of "baby mama drama"... and Rappers? Well, I'm definitely the chick that will push my man to reach for his dreams, but I can't do the struggling rapper thing. I will not peddle your mix tape. I don't want to drag my friends to your concerts.. I just don't want to listen to you spit "hot fiyah" on the 1s and 2s.

Last night I came across a video by one of my favorite YouTubers, Taren916, and she was speaking about a forum topic that hit close to home for her: Are single mothers damaged goods? My first reaction to this was "of course not," but it made me think back to how I used to hold onto the idea that men with multiple kids were, in a way, damaged goods to me.

Oftentimes we accept the fact that men can have multiple children by multiple women and this is okay. They're just "being men"... leaving women in the same position being deemed ratchet and a slew of other terms that flex that annoying double standard muscle. In fact, the older I get the more I realize that life really "does happen" and people find themselves in various situations. I don't think anyone ever intends to be a baby mama or baby daddy. Most people don't want to bring children into the world in an unstable environment, nor do people want to tackle parenting alone... but if you find yourself in that situation it doesn't make you less than or damaged goods.

So, my question to the blogosphere: Do you feel single parents (men and women) with multiple children are damaged goods? Would you date someone that had children? Should a divorced person with children be held in a higher standing than someone that was never married, yet has multiple children?

Natural Hair: Grecian Goddess Bun

I don't know if it's the term "protective styling" or the concept of wearing my hair tucked away... but it evokes images of boring twists/braids and makes my life force shed a few tears. Still, I know if nice to give my hair a break from the daily styling every once in a while and tuck my ends away.

While browsing YouTube I came across a great video on how to spice up "protective styling" with a Grecian Goddess Bun!! Many thanks to vlogger Fusion of Cultures for her great video. I can't wait to give this style a try.

What's your number?

Numbers, numbers, numbers... they're so much fun when you're fantasizing about winning the lottery or how many pairs of shoes you'd like to own - - but when someone asks you the number of people you've slept with, it can stop you in your tracks.

I don't know if it's due to being caught off guard, embarrassment, or a mixture of both... but whenever I've been asked my number of sexual partners it makes me feel a certain way.

I'm not a liar by nature so my first inclination is to tell the truth, but depending on who I'm speaking with I can definitely hesitate and rethink answering this question altogether. If your number is higher than theirs it can make for an awkward situation. If your number is too low then a man will usually assume you're full of shit and multiply that by 3. As a woman that's a few years shy of 30 (and it sounds crazy as hell to actually see that being typed in front of my eyes lol), I realize that by the age of 30 most people have lived a lot of life, ran through some folks, had their fair share of relationships, one night "one and dones," and potentially racked up a nice list of names. Still, I try to reserve judgment because while sexual health and conversations are important, I don't think a person can be reduced to a single number of people they've been intimate with. On top of that, I just don't believe anyone truly wants to know the answer to this question when being asked.


So, when it comes to a new person in your life do you think it's better to be honest and throw your real number out there or keep that under wraps?

What happens in Vegas....

In less than 24 hours I will be soaking up the desert sun in Vegas for another fun-filled weekend with #TeamDoubleTrouble. I don't have plans of getting too ratchet (by my standards lol), but I will definitely partake in a few shenanigans.

On another note, my ipod that had been broken for nearly a year magically decided to start working again!!! I considered this a blessing from the technology gods and backed it up. So freaking thrilled to have access to all of my old tunes. Definitely a happy camper.

What are your weekend plans?

That's in the past...

Recently I was speaking with a friend who in short said he feared making mistakes in life. It caused me to wonder how someone could get through life without making any mistakes... I mean, weren't mistakes truly life experiences all leading us down a path of growing into the person we currently are today?

Overall the concept of one's past is an interesting thing. It can be riddled with a slew of mistakes, successes, shortcomings, bad decisions, regrets, highs, and lows... but as it pertains to a new relationship how much of the past is truly in the past.

The older I get the more I realize that being judgmental is for the birds and "mistakes" are made every day. I don't believe that poor choices define a person, nor are you the sum total of a few choices you've made. There is no time like the present and in reality you can spin anything to be bad or good - - it's all about your outlook My mom has told me many times that I missed my calling as a lawyer. My tarot lady (yes, I have one of those lol) told me that my tongues is like a double edged sword and very powerful. I'd have to agree with both of them... however, I think I choose to view life from an open-minded standpoint, well aware that "shit happens" and you have to keep it moving. I'm never short of an opinion, but I try to refrain from judging based on someone's past.

I value the person standing in front of me today. If you're exuding an energy that I love and presenting to me a person that is worthy of friendship, trust, love, and time why withhold mutual feelings based on your past? I mean, isn't your past responsible for shaping you into the person that I enjoy so much? In my eyes it is.

Now, don't get me wrong... I'm very well aware of the fact some pills are harder to swallow than others, but when you are in a new (or old) relationship how much of your past do you choose to share? And how much of someones past can be shared with you without forming judgments?

And that's how you make panties fall off...

Have you ever listened to Marvin Gaye? Not just listened to him... but really listened to Marvin Gaye with someone that's a musical connoisseur of Marvin Gaye? Well, let me tell you... be prepared when you do. Have some wine, candles and a fresh pair of panties because I can guarantee the ones you're wearing will be soaked! Ahh, Marvin Gaye. That man was amazing.

I recently had the chance to listen to a few songs and it dawned on me that while Al Green was singing his heart out about emotions, Marvin Gaye was swooning women and smooth talking panties into a legit ninja vanish! The man had game. I'm not the most soulful person anyone knows (by far), but listening to older music I was able to fall into a groove and appreciate the quality that is really lost nowadays.

So, in good fun who is your favorite: Marvin Gaye or Al Green?


...the man in action...

I'm on call... and I'm not a doctor

I'm on call this week for work... but there's a catch - - I'm not a fucking doctor!! Yes, that's right. Yours truly is on call for the wonderful world of advertising, so if some digital ads start glitching out? I'll be to the rescue. Who cares about kids being rushed into the ER. I'm on call for something WAY more important - - digital campaigns. <end rant> lol...

On another note I'm being forced to carry around this hideous ancient as fuck blackberry and all I can wonder if how I kept that contraption for 3.5 years!!! What the heezy? I'm SO happy I made the switch to an iPhone. My blackberry was like living in the dark ages. *sigh* So happy those days are over.

I feel the need to acknowledge the fact that I feel blessed and fortunate to have a job, but I do find being "on call" to be one of the most ridiculous aspects of my job. Hands down. Period.

So, to all of my gainfully employed blogging friends, what is the most obnoxiously, over the top aspect of your 9-5?

A Tale of Two Wets

Is period sex really that bad?

Yes... I'm starting this blog post with the very direct and oh so necessary question. Everyone wants sex, yet every month like clockwork women find themselves sidelined for a very good reason... for when our periods DON'T come it usually incites panic and sheer terror in the hearts of men everywhere lol.

Recently the topic of "period sex" came up between a girlfriend and I and it made me wonder what others thought. Some men are strictly opposed to it. Some could care less... but when it come down to it, is wet really wet? Or does that hint of red change the game.

Personally I don't have any issues with having sex at any time... Period or no period I'm good to go. I will say that there are definitely days that a woman won't want to be touched, but typically it's not that big of a deal. Grab a towel and let's keep it moving. Need another option? Hop in the shower lol... nothing like some warm water to wash away the red desperation.

This topic might be a bit TMI for most, but I'm random, opinionated and love talking about everything with everyone lol... Thoughts?

Practice Makes Perfect?

Earlier today my guy sent me a link to the new Drake video "Practice" and told me he was engaged in an online argument regarding the chick shaking her ass... (Gotta love Facebook lol). He claimed women were being haters and I wanted to see what the fuss was all about.



So, let's get the obvious out of the way... yes, her room is dirty. Her shit is chaotic. All very realistic things. She's lounging around the "house" shaking her ass in the mirror. All women do that. I think the online "hate" comes into play because so many sub-par or basic bitch type of chicks with a fat ass and NOTHING else to offer get a pass from men.

Now, to be fair and play devil's advocate, it's not to say men are locking these chicks down and giving them rings, but they will get fucked and taken to dinner, usually... so women that have shit going for themselves minus the giganto ass get annoyed b/c they're feeling sub-par to those women.

In my opinion men are simple. Extremely simple. They are visual creatures and like ass. So, to me.. the video was basic. To a guy... it's a fat ass shaking for nearly 4 minutes and they don't require much more. A clean room? A bed that's made? Girl, please... they could care less.

If my ass was that big I'd have half the personality I do because it wouldn't be necessary. Twerk that ass for 5 minutes - - You don't have to talk or do much else lol... but even the fattest ass gets old so you really do need more (which is common knowledge) ... but again, this is a video so it's not that serious.

In reality the video was genius - - a fat ass, super low budget to save $, conversation starter lol... and know what? I'm sure everyone will start shaking it to this song in the confines of their home... some will even post their own video on YouTube in 5, 4, 3, 2.....

Thoughts?

Smitten...

I'm currently stuck in Hartford, Connecticut waiting for my flight back to Chicago, and what better way to pass the time than downing drinks with my coworker and looking at pretty condos.

I came across this post on one of my favorite blogs, Made by Girl, and was instantly reminded of my love for interior decorating and city living. I'm on the apartment hunt (yet again) and have a few rentals lined up to view this upcoming weekend - - yet another reason why I'm eager to get back to Chicago.

Hotel Vlog #1

Who would have thought being 10 mins late to my gate would cause my day to be thrown off by12 hours. 3 flights and 1 emergency landing later I finally made it to Connecticut for my first official business trip! It's been forever since I had down time and the opportunity to be completely alone. I'm excited to be able to catch up on blogging and vlogging - - I even was able to crank out a video!!! My goal is to record each day this week... let's see how that goes. Am I reaching for the stars on that one? lol

Happy New Year



New Year's Eve

I started writing this post on January 2nd, but my life force has been on shenanigans as of late so I'm finally finding the time to post this now! The new year is in full swing and I'm slightly ashamed to admit I spent the first few days on a 72 hr champagne diet. Yes... I solely survived on champagne, orange juice, and restaurant food for 3 days. It was kind of amazing. Oh, and a hookah! Can't forget about the hookah. I'm not a smoker, but I'm always down to light up a hookah. Homemade cocktails, great friends, and a hookah - - what better way to start 2012!

Dominican Republic

Adding to my blogging struggles was my highly anticipated trip to the Dominican Republic with my bestie LadyLa83. We spent 5 days frolicking on the beaches of the DR and taking our ratchet shenanigans international! I had a lovely time, learned so much, and actually appreciated the fact we were without cell phones and internet access. It was refreshing to be unplugged from the matrix for a few days, and I don't think we could've done it any other way - - cold turkey like an addict.

I got back to the states last week and intended to blog about my trip, but realized that there's a certain beauty in keeping some things just between the people that were there. I'll share a few funny moments in another post, but I won't be my usual self and OD on Facebook albums lol.

I can't believe that I'm boarding another flight in the AM to head East for work. This is my first official business trip and I'm looking forward to it, but slightly dreading having to fly again - - only because we were JUST flying and I literally just washed the sand out of my clothes from the DR vacation. Nevertheless, I'm blessed to have a job and will rise to the occasion. Maybe the down time in the hotel will allow me to crank out a few blog posts.

If you're still reading my blog, muchas gracias. I always realize that when I get busy living life, I sometimes start to slack on my blogging... which is a good thing because everyone needs to pull their head out of the computer long enough to enjoy the people around them... plus I'm getting TONS of blog material lol.

So, what posts are in store?

1) Update on my hair color/Brazilian Blowout

2) Brazilian Blowout (the company) sent me a wonderful, handwritten thank you card for the posts I've written along with the entire line of products

3) Finally posting my full review/video (hopefully) of the curlformers

4) Art of the Ninja Vanish

5) Interior Design and Apartment hunt updates

6) A few random things about life, love, and reality TV lol



Have you been cuffed?

Winter is officially here and cuffing season is in mid-swing. Even though the weather has been mild for the most part, the urge to get cuffed has not disappeared.

Folks that didn't want to cuff someone prior to Christmas (for fear of shelling out dough on a gift for someone that would only last a few months), Christmas is over and NYE is on the horizon... a fun introductory holiday to spend with your latest cuffing victim!! What's better than a cute outfit, drinks, and lip locking your new boo?

For those that aren't aware, Cuffing Season officially lasts from November to March, so if you haven't found a cuff-mate don't fear -- you have a little time left. But I'd urge you to have your cuddle buddy in place by mid January so you can prepare for the winter freeze that is February in Chicago.

I was a little rusty on my Cuffing Season etiquette, so I found the below video to give myself a refresher. Remember, "it's cold outside and everyone needs a cuff buddy" lol.